BURNOUT WEEK::the juggling act

It's almost the end of summer.

Have you and your PH (and your PKs, if you have them) had a vacation yet? Have you escaped the hustle and bustle for some quiet rejuvenation? Have you gone camping and danced in the woods? Have you lain still on a blanket and watched the clouds float by?

If you're like us, it's hard to plan vacation time and make it actually happen. Unless you're lucky enough to work in a larger multi-pastor church, it can be nearly impossible to get away for rejuvenation. Who will preach? Who will plan the service? Who will answer the phones?

Burnout is actually a huge, HUGE issue among pastors and their families. (See tomorrow's post for the latest studies on this.) It's in our job description to give. After a while, it becomes part of our nature to just keep on caring for people - often at the cost of our own well-being. And every now and then we need to make sure to get away and have some fun.

Now I'm not advocating that all hard-working ministers should just sit back and ask to be waited on hand and foot. But how can we serve others in a healthy way if we are worn down and beat up ourselves?

Dr. Gwen Wagstrom Halaas, a family physician who is married to a Lutheran minister and who wrote a 2004 book raising the alarm about clergy health (“The Right Road: Life Choices for Clergy”), described the problem as a misperception about serving God.

“They think that taking care of themselves is selfish, and that serving God means never saying no,” she said.  (Taking a Break from the Lord's Work, Paul Vitello, New York Times)

I'm the workaholic, never-take-a-vacation type, usually because I can't figure out how we'd pay for it. I tend to see time off as wasteful, and travel with a pre-toddler can be more work than it's worth. My PH on the other hand, sees vacation as a necessary aspect of healthcare. It doesn't have to cost much, but he knows that we can't serve the church well, make wise spiritual decisions, or stay harmonious at home when we are running in burnout mode.

And my PH's district supervisors agree with him. They actually asked him point blank halfway through the summer: "Have you put your family vacation on the church calendar yet?"

So we went up north for a week, to attend a friend's wedding. And we made a big loop, stopping to visit old friends and fellow pastor families along the way.

I'm still recuperating from all the fun we had. But I'm glad we went. (And it was super cheap, too!)

Have you had YOUR vacation yet?

A FEW LINKS & RESOURCES ABOUT PASTORAL BURNOUT:

• No Rest for the Holy: Clergy Burnout a Growing Concern, David Gibson, Politics Daily
• Soul Care the the Roots of Clergy Burnout, Anne Dilenschneider, The Huffington Post
• Taking a Break from the Lord's Work, Paul Vitello, The New York Times
• Study finds Canadian clergy burned out, isolated, The Presbyterian Outlook
  
• National Clergy Renewal Program
• Clergy Health Initiative, Duke Divinity School

© CLUTCH, 2010 unless otherwise sourced.
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milk & honey

Dear Girlfriends,

Today I'm writing you a letter, normally I have an article but I felt a letter was needed.

There are times in ministry where it's just plain ugly and hard. Summers can be one of those times. (I think I just heard a chorus of amens across the internet.)

Summertime brings amazing memories and laughter but also sometimes tears. So many times in ministry Summer beats us down... way down. People are gone on vacation, they sleep in, they are busy with activities and church becomes an afterthought. Tithing drops, attendance fluctuates and your hubby can get discouraged. If God has promised great things for your family and your church, then you need to keep reading, and stand on this in discouraging times.

Numbers 23:19 says "God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promiseand not fulfill?"  When summer makes other people flaky, don’t evaluate God’s reliability like a human’s. God will never lie, never deceive, never mislead, and God will not change His mind. You can trust God, you can rely on Him, to keep His promises in every detail.

Joshua 23:14: "Not one of all the good promises the LORD your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed."

I truly believe that there are times that are so hard in ministry. So I want to encourage you to use the slow summer months to spy on your city.

Go see that your city is flowing with milk and honey, but don't be discouraged by that fruit. The city is powerful with lots of people, issues and things to overcome, but use this time to ask God to direct you and your husband where he may lead.

Pray over your city. Instead of fighting against the things that seem so heavy, flow with it, change it up, and speak life over your city, your church and your marriage.

Spend your influence wisely and leave your sweet smelling scent wherever you may go! Meet new people, and develop relationships. Enjoy your family!!!

And go read Psalm 48!!!

Embrace your summer, ladies, it goes so fast!
Rachael

© CLUTCH, 2010 unless otherwise sourced.
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going home

Ahhh…the feel of coming home. As we drive around the serene Pennsylvania countryside, with the peaceful cows munching on grass, and the gentle rolling hills dotted with farmhouses and barns, a sigh escapes my lips. My husband asks, “Why the sigh?” and I honestly don’t know the answer.

You see, we left Pennsylvania four years ago to take a call in Georgia. We have come back to visit family. His family. He is the PA native; I am the GA girl. Of course they are my family too, as I love them with all my heart; but my family is all in Georgia. So why this sigh of nostalgia, of longing? When I lived here I longed for Georgia. But now that we are living in Georgia, I long for here.

“Do you wish we could come back?” my husband asks.

Do I? Yes, in many ways. However, things have changed here. People have moved, new people have come. Places are different, dynamics are different. We could never recapture now the way it was then.

I turn my thoughts to our current home. I love the people and the church dearly. I love the Georgia way. I love the vibrancy of our ministry. I especially love being near my family. My husband and I have grown so much over the four years we have been in our new church, and our children have thrived. So why am I so melancholy at this moment?

I ponder this question, and quietly pray for an answer.

The answer comes to my spirit in a whisper:

Because that was your home. But where you are now is your home. Every place I have put you is your home. I have grown and developed you in each place, and each place has become a part of who you are. And I will continue to grow you where I plant you in the future. However, you will never be fully content, because your true home isn’t here on this earth—it is in Heaven, with Me. That is where your Home is, and that is what your heart longs for.

Perhaps this combined sense of longing for the past, but yearning for the future, that I live with--that I thought plagued me—is straight from God. It doesn’t mean I’m not content where I am. It means that I am always ready for whatever God has in store. Each place, each new adventure, is just one step closer to our final destination.

Ahhh…the feel of going home!

© CLUTCH, 2010 unless otherwise sourced.
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apologies...

Girls, I owe you an apology.

This week has been scant on posts, and it's my fault. We were visiting the grandparents in another state for Memorial Day, and the week has been crazy.

A few days ago, my 7-month old son reached up to pat daddy's face and accidentally gouged out a chunk of daddy's cornea instead.

That required a trip to the doctor, a round of antibiotics, and a pirate-worthy eyepatch! It also meant that I needed to do all the family driving for a bit.

And blogging dropped to the bottom of my priority list.

We'll get back on track next week. Thanks for your patience in the meantime!!

© Sarah K. Asaftei, 2009 unless otherwise sourced. Use allowed by express written permission only.

(Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone.)

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