making ministry out of hobbies...

Sometimes, it seems to be very difficult to connect with people outside our husbands' congregation. I mean, there are so many needs and demands from the people at church, that as a PW it can start to feel exhausting. We still want to minister, and we want to share Jesus with people "out there" somewhere. But how?

Last Thursday night I decided to be brave and try out a fitness class at our new gym. BP (before pregnancy) I was a 5-days-a-week-at-the-gym kind of girl. But the last six and a half months of constant nausea kind of took the wind out of my sails.

But I believe regular exercise is a big part of being healthy with this body temple God gave me (you know, 1 Corinthians 6:19 and all), so now that I'm feeling a bit better I've been slowly going back. It's amazing how much slower I move at almost 7 months pregnant!

Since I don't want to overexert, I settled on AquaFit - a swimming pool class filled with little old ladies and.... me. The lady beside me was perhaps 75 years old, and from Wales. She asked when the baby was coming, and then shared about her hobbies - knitting and painting for all her grandchildren.

Perhaps I'm an odd duck for this generation, but I do a lot of practical hobbies too. Crocheting, needlework, sewing, gardening, etc... Knitting however is something I've never seemed to learn beyond the basics.

She told me she can knit just about anything, and has been doing it for years. I asked if she'd teach me sometime, since she lives so close by, or even if she'd be willing to teach a few ladies from my church. Her eyes lit up like she'd been asked to go to a banquet!

Next time I see her, I'm going to talk to her more about it. She seemed lonely and eager for friendship.

In the meantime, I left the AquaFit class reminded that even hobbies can give a chance to connect with somebody. My hobby of exercise, combined with my interest in knitting, and voila! A chance to minister.

Ever had a friendship or ministry opportunity come out of your hobby? Do share!

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finding a PW mentor...

It can be tough PWing alone.

Really tough.

Sometimes it feels like we're right there with Elijah when he wailed to God that he was the ONLY faithful prophet left in the whole wide world! (Of course he wasn't, and God reminded him so, but he still felt totally alone.)

Western society doesn't really offer much in the way of social structures for mentoring, so we girls sometimes have to create our own opportunities. For the shy among us, this can be pretty daunting. But the payoff is amazing.

For me, having a few good mentors has made all the difference. I'm blessed to have a Christian mother whose insights are usually spot on. But now and then I've realized that even a great mom can't carry the burden of knowing all PW details. Not having been a PW herself, despite her deep spiritual maturity, there's some things she just can't relate to. And sometimes it's better for her not to know when I'm dealing with a particularly difficult person - it's just too hard to sit back and not defend me.

So I've sought out other wise women, other Mothers in Israel, who can provide insights and intuitive suggestions for challenging situations. Some of them are mostly by email, others offer advice when we chat online. One or two are the type who don't mind me calling for advice out of the blue.

And a few have blossomed into personal friendships that span the generations and have become rare treasures.

I've learned though, that while today's culture fails to provide formal mentoring structures, it also has negatively affected older and younger women's interaction. Younger women often tend to feel that the older generation is completely out of touch, instead of revering them for their wisdom and experience. And while there are always those older women who offer unwelcome and unsolicited advice - I've found that most of them are on the opposite end. They feel intimidated into isolation and silence by the younger generation, as though they worth has passed with the peak of their beauty and usefulness. As a result, many are hesitant to share even when their insights would be welcomed.

It took me a while to get past my fear of approaching older women and asking for their wisdom, but once I discovered that most of them responded with surprised pleasure, I realized it wasn't so hard.

So if you feel a longing for mentorship and just don't know where to get started, here's what I'd suggest:

• pray about it; ask God to help you know whom to ask
• genuinely approach the woman you'd like to know better, and ask if she'd be willing to get together sometime and pass on some of her accumulated wisdom
• be open to learning from unexpected sources - not all of your great mentors will be PWs, although many of them may
• just listen to what they have to say, and ask God which parts he wants you to learn from, realizing that not everything may directly apply to you

How about you? Do you have a mentor or more than one? Who do you turn to for wise, godly counsel? How did you find them? Have you ever actually asked someone to be your mentor?

What would you say to a young PW who wants to find a mentor and doesn't know where to start?

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connecting locations...

We've already had a good response for getting connected locally!

I (Sarah) will be coordinating a meetup in the next few weeks for the Atlanta, GA region, and three other PW readers have offered to be contacted for meetups in their local areas.

If you live in one of these areas, don't be shy!

ATLANTA AREA:
Email Sarah if you're within driving distance of Atlanta and you're interested in an August meetup:
clutchtalk (at) gmail (dot) com

NW OHIO (near Michigan/Indiana state lines):
Email Sheila if you live near northwest Ohio or around the Michigan and Indiana state lines:
jsbrown96 (at) gmail (dot) com

DALLAS/FT WORTH:
Drop Alison a comment on this post on her blog if you are in the Dallas/Ft Worth region:
http://thisisnotaroughdraft.blogspot.com/2009/07/from-parsonage.html

NW FLORIDA/ALABAMA:
Email Amy if you'd like to get together in the Florida panhandle or southern Alabama:
ftgreen4 (at) gmail (dot) com


If more of you are willing to give your email address for young PWs in your area to contact you about getting together where YOU live, just send your name/location/email to clutchtalk (at) gmail (dot) com.

Also, we hope you'll take a few photos when you get together and tell us how it went! We'd love to post reports about your regional meetups here on CLUTCH!

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chime in::planning unfamiliar events

After the June 15 post on mother blessings, Stephanie wrote us asking this question:

My dilema is that I am asked to plan events such as this (baby showers) but I am not a mother as of yet. What do I do?

Being a PW can really get you out of your comfort zone, especially when people ask you to help with things that are unfamiliar to you. It doesn't mean you have to say "No", but it might require a little extra research, and maybe even a partnership with some of the older ladies in church who could give helpful feedback. Who knows, you might even make new friends as a result!

When I am asked to do/host/lead something I'm not familiar with, I have a few standard next-steps:

1. Call my mom (or another older woman with expertise in whatever it is)
2. Google for ideas, tips, concepts, columnists' opinions, etc (i.e., for planning a baby shower, I'd look for task lists, theme ideas, and so on)
   
3. Chat online with other PWs or girlfriends who are creative and don't mind me asking for input
4. Make a list of ideas that come to me and narrow them down
5. Ask other church women to help coordinate aspects they're good at (decorating, food, music, games, etc)
   
6. Partner with another woman (or a few of them) in church leadership to be a team for the spiritual side of things (i.e., asking other PWs to say a prayer, offer a blessing over the mother, etc)

I've found that older women are often flattered and honored to be asked to participate in something I'm planning as the young PW, and if I'm willing to ask them for the wisdom and advice that they've collected over the years - I usually gain fabulous insights, and the beginning of a new friendship as well.

That's me - now what would YOU suggest that Stephanie (and anyone else who shares her feelings) do when they are faced with the unfamiliar?

Got tips?

Do share!

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an invitation to connect...

I've recently begun wishing there was a way for more CLUTCH readers to meet up in person. I admit I love online interaction, but no matter how real you are online there's a certain isolated sterility that you just can't avoid.

So I got the idea to plan a luncheon somewhere in my general area for any CLUTCH readers that might be within driving distance, so we could spend a few hours meeting together, connecting, and enjoying the fellowship already begun online.

Are there any CLUTCH readers in the general Chattanooga/Atlanta area?

If so, would you be interested in getting together with other CLUTCH readers for lunch in the near future? Just leave a comment below, or send me an email at: clutchtalk (at) gmail (dot) com.

For that matter, PW luncheons don't have to be limited to my local area. If any of you would be interested in meeting up with other readers in your area, leave a comment below so that you can find each other. If you'd be willing to help coordinate a group lunch date for those near you, please include your email address so that other PWs can contact you.

Can't wait to find out who lives near me!

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