the pastor's children

My two boys LOVE to preach. They follow daddy’s moves, his walk, they wear suits like daddy does, they watch his preaching videos over and over and over, did I say OVER. I think I have some of his sermon’s memorized myself. My boys will put daddy’s cologne on, set out as many stuff animals as they own (as their members) take out a music stand (pulpit) and start preaching away in the game room. This is their fun.

This past weekend, Bishop Holcomb, our Father in the Faith, kicked off our annual Leaders that Lead Conference. Now I must say Bishop & Pastor Val are not only our Pastors/Spiritual Parents but www.chop.org is where we served before we founded Breath of Life. While it’s not the only ministry we’ve served, it IS the only place outside of our own church the boys know. Our extended family there has seen the boys grow over the years. Our boys are very familiar with the place, people and protocol. This particular Sunday, it was Matthew’s first time on the East Wing. You see the West wing has birth to 4yrs old, the “other-side” is for the “big kids”. Well Matthew is now 5 and on the East Wing. So he wasn’t sure what to expect at Heritage Kingdom. Marcus on the other hand, knew the registration drill, order of service, exit/pick up procedures etc. Marcus asked that morning if he could go to “big church” because he missed Papa Bishop and wanted to hear him preach. The mommy side of me wanted to bring him so bad; because there is nothing like hearing Bishop in person. However, my spirit kept saying no.

For two weeks prior to us going, the Holy Spirit would prompt me to send Marcus to Children’s Church at CHOP on that particular Sunday. I’m so glad I followed the prompting of the Spirit, because by divine orchestration INSPIRATION and IMPARTATION occurred. It was priceless!

Imagine a room, more like a large cafeteria size with 300+ kiddos ready for children’s church. They did praise and worship and up next, instead of a Children’s Minister delivering the word that morning, a 9 year old brought the Word forth. Yes, a 9 year old, NINE year old, after 8 before 10. Marcus couldn't quit talking about it ALL day. He said mom, a kid preached. I said a real kid, or a teenager? He said no a kid he was 9 and just a little bit taller than me. Mom that is exactly what I dream of doing. I dream of preaching. I dream of preaching to the world. I want to save lives. (He just turned 7, yes we know Jesus saves – disclaimer) Marcus was INSPIRED! He said I have never met a kid like ME who loves to preach! It couldn't have been better planned, it was divine orchestration from the Holy Spirit. Now I know, not every PK will enter ministry. But I am keen enough to be aware, recognize and identify the call of God on my baby. What blessed me the most was all the idea’s that started spinning out as he told me about his dreams for ministry.

Inspiration: a divine influence or action on a person believe to qualify him or her to receive and communicate sacred revelation. Without going into details of our moment that day, I want to ask what inspires your children? We took pictures behind the children’s church pulpit I wanted to share with you. I don't ever want to be guilty of down playing the work of the ministry because it's become familiar and not cultivate the gifts God has placed in our children. I don't want to be guilty of choking the seed we strive so hard to plant in our children. I found out what 9 year old preached and turns out we know his parents well. So, we will have them over for dinner next month.

Maybe your princess has a gift to sing. Or Johnny boy is creative and mercy motivated. Pastor Val preached about leadership keys during one of our morning sessions. She challenged us as Pastors to be sure to recognize and cultivate the gifts inside our own little ones as well. This weekend turned out rather perfect. To God be the glory!

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death, darkness, demons and... Christian pastor's families?

It's Halloween.

Here at CLUTCH, we're not celebrating.

We don't think we're better than anybody else. And we don't want to pick a fight. But we do feel called to take a stand.

We feel that, as wives and families of God's local leaders, it is our calling to bring light and hope and the gospel wherever we go. We believe we have no business participating in a day set aside to honor death and darkness.

We believe that when God said "Do not let your people... engage in witchcraft," (Deut 18:9-11, NLT) that He didn't mean just skipping the hard core stuff. And when the Apostle Paul lumped sorcery along with sexual immorality, hostility and dissension as "sins" that "will not inherit the Kingdom of God" - he was actually serious. (Gal 5:20, NLT)

When people in the early Christian church became believers in God, those "who had been practicing sorcery brought their incantation books and burned them at a public bonfire." Even though the books were worth the equivalent of several million dollars. (Acts 19:19, NLT)

So we personally don't feel that it's okay to joke around with the devil. Or play games of pretend that mimic demonic activities. Or even go around for candy on a day that our culture has handed over to the celebration of darkness.

Sure, we know that not everyone who participates in Halloween is acting from some deep dark motive. Sure, it could be fun to stock up on candy (unless, of course, you're trying really hard to keep sugar out of the house!). And kids can definitely be cute in sweet little costumes.

But it's no joke to goof off with satanic influences. So our families will just do cute costumes some other day of the year.

Tomorrow, Veronica will share how she explains their family's stand on Halloween to her kids in simple, clear ways that they can understand.

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date night with the PD...

Kids crave time with daddy. Sadly, lots of PKs may get even less time with their PD (pastor dad) than regular kids do.

Even when they get the same amount of time with Dad that other kids do, PKs are often under a different amount of pressure and expectations than other kids. Which means that intentional, quality time with Dad is even more important.

Last year, we posted about a research study on why PKs leave the church. Two of the biggest factors are:

• unreasonable behavioral expectations just because their daddy is the pastor, and
• lack of family relationality at home.

So how can we make it different in our homes?

One big way, is to make sure each child gets individual quality time with their PD. I read one parenting book that said "dad should never leave the house without taking a child along". Obviously, that doesn't work all the time, but it's a great idea. Gotta run a household errand? Take a kid with you. Gotta go to church early? Take a kid with you.

One of my PH's ultimate childhood memories is about times like this with his dad, who wasn't a pastor but taught a study class at church each weekend. They lived in Communist Romania, where Christianity wasn't exactly a popular choice. Every weekend, rain or snow or shine, he and his daddy would walk  two miles to church early in the morning, without his mom or sisters. He got to sit and listen to the teachers discuss and prepare for their classes before everyone else arrived.

His father died when my PH was only 14, and those little boy memories of going to church at dawn with daddy are deeply cherished.

Another way to increase family relationships is to have a sacred family day every week. Nothing gets in the way, not meetings, not phone calls, not emails, not sermon prep. It is so special that nothing short of fire, flood or death will keep Daddy away. Let the kids decide what to do on Family Day sometimes. Plan special outings, or just stay home and play games on the living room floor. What you do together doesn't matter so much as the doing of it.

Besides regular weekly family days (or at least half-days), try having daddy put each child on his calendar for a actual date - at least once a month. It can be for just an hour, but during that time daddy's phone is turned off and his attention is focused on that one child for the entire time.

Got more great ideas? How do YOU keep your family connected? Leave a comment!

© CLUTCH, 2010 unless otherwise sourced.
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CLUTCHcritic::scripture memory aids

I would be true
For there are those who trust me
I would be pure
For there are those who care
I would be strong
To turn my eyes from evil
Choosing good thoughts
And strengthened by a prayer

So go the words to my son's latest favorite lullaby. While we love lots of kinds of music, my PH and I talked at length before our little guy arrived about the home atmosphere we wanted to create for him. We figured there will be plenty of time for him to listen to the rest of the music out there, and most sources won't be offering the very best - God's word.

So we've searched high and low for a nice library of kids' music that is both enjoyable and gentle, fun and moral. During these early years, while he's like a sponge of learning, our goal is to get as much Scripture into his fabulous little mind as possible.

And we discovered a Christian family business online that sells books and CDs with kids reading and then singing scripture chapters and short choruses (like his favorite lullaby). The funny thing is, we find ourselves unconsciously memorizing entire chapters as we play the songs for him. Since memorization doesn't top my list of fave recreation activities, that's a huge plus.

Unlike a lot of kid's music, which is so bouncy it makes me want to climb walls long before a child would tire of it, these songs are almost soothing.

If you've been looking for great children's Scripture memory resources, Thy Word Creations might be a good place to start. If you have some of their materials, or order some because you read about it here, leave a comment and share your review.

DISCLAIMER: CLUTCHcritic only reviews resources, music & materials that we think might be relevant for young pastoral wives and their families. We do not receive perks or returns of any kind in exchange for our reviews. A CLUTCHcritic review does not indicate endorsement of the product being reviewed. CLUTCHcritic takes no responsibility for the opinions, doctrine, lifestyle or teaching of products or their producers.

© CLUTCH, 2010 unless otherwise sourced.
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