PMS: supporting your very human pastor husband

It's PMS week again girls, and this month we're talking about giving our Pastor Husbands (PHs) support.

Anyone who is married knows that giving real biblical support to your husband is a tough assignment. You know, the respect & submit to your husband as the head of the marriage part of things. (And no, I didn't make this up - read Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3 if you're a little fuzzy on the scriptural details.)

But giving that kind of support to your husband, WHILE LIVING IN THE FISHBOWL? That can make the privilege of being a wife seem almost impossible. I mean, if it is our God-given role to:

• support this man,
  
• to build him up,
  
• to remind him of his calling to serve,
  
• to give him freedom to fulfill that calling,
  
• to affirm him to his face and to others,
• to encourage his church to trust him and follow his leadership,
  
• and to make him feel like a king in the home....
  

uhhh, just who exactly are we free to vent to when we're mad?

You know how it goes. It's been a horrid day, your very human PH did something stupid (or that you just plain don't agree with), and you need a sounding board.

If you call your mom, she'll get mad at your husband just to support you.

If you call his mom, she'll get mad at you for NOT supporting him.

If you call a friend outside your congregation who isn't a PW, she probably won't understand what you're going through.

If you call a friend inside the congregation, they may not always keep it to themselves.

If you call a fellow PW (or two or three), she'll probably understand and can likely commiserate - but you're almost guaranteed to transition from healthy venting into a good old-fashioned husband-bashing fest. Which brings relief in the short-term... but afterward you feel a little sick inside because now this other person outside your marriage knows too much detail about your husband's private flaws.

(NOTE: We're not talking about getting help from abuse, or seeking confidential mentorship and advice for serious issues here.)

So how do we maintain our sanity as women married to wonderful but very human men of God - while supporting, respecting, loving, and honoring them?

Let's talk about it.