PMS WEEK:: mentorship can transform your life (part 1)

>> October 5, 2011

Mentoring is our PMS topic of the week. Did you realize mentoring is relational and coaching is functional? Both are different yet tend to cross lanes?

I thought about writing the difference between coaching and mentoring. Then I thought I'd break down compatibility vs. comparability. Later I brainstormed I could elaborate on how to find a mentor, what to look for in a mentor and how to be a good mentoree. Instead, I decided to tell you stories, true stories and we'll cover the other details tomorrow in part 2.

(names have been changed)

Mike and Emily have been married three years. In three years their credit score has gone from excellent to no one will lend you a dollar. They lost their home, they drive a not so new car and their financial world came crumbling down when Mike accepted a position at a church and well, never got paid. After month one, the salary was suppose to be dispersed and it didn't come. Behind one bill here then there, then it turned into a mudslide. Mike didn't want to verbally slam the Pastor but at the same time his financial world was falling a part. Mike and Emily felt like failures, how could they be following God and this happens. He obviously had to quit and find another position else where but as you are going through an ugly process especially where money and people are involved it's very hard. Emily reached out to her mentor because she began to grow resentful of the money and ministry situation. A lot of times when you are walking through a situation, you need a corner man. Someone to look in from the outside and tell you what they see. Emily was willing to disclose, that means overcoming trust barriers, self branding complex, and reach out for help. Emily reaching out, helped save her marriage, their finances and their ministry.

Janie Joe was married to Johnny Jacobs. Together they looked so happy, but in reality they had mastered the art of being fake. Janie Joe and Johnny Jacobs really hated each other. The thought of one another made them sick. They stayed together because it was easy. I believe he said and I quote "It is cheaper to keep her." Every week he'd man the pulpit and week after week the congregation would decline. He finally was consumed with anger all the time. He'd verbally lash out at Janie Joe and the kids. Finally at a breaking point Janie Joe reached out to a mentor. Someone who had walked in the ministry shoes she walked in. They offered prayer, and became actively involved in helping restore this couple. But what if Janie Joe had a mentor from the on set. What could have been.....

Jack and Susie are planting a church. They have no funds and have used his last paycheck to start the church. They are definitely called but their strategy for taking their city is not aligned correctly. They have a great heart and good intentions. For six years, their church plant struggled. Their core team quite after the first two years, they simply were unable to get it up. Should they have had network support, the opportunity to learn from other leaders experiences how different would their life have been? Six years, eight years later they are still in the boat of beginning stages.

These are just tiny pieces to huge, long, three hour stories. But I want to convey to you the need for a mentor. We all have our own stories. Some super easy and fun, others rough and rugged. Tomorrow we will cover how to find a mentor? What to expect and a few other key points.

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